February 22nd, 2015
I'm up early on a Sunday, as usual! Even though my Saturday was quite uneventful, my weekend feels to be very exciting and life changing.
Into my life.
February 14, 2015
Last night, my best friend and I did a partner's yoga class that was offered in honor of Valentine's Day. We were more excited for the wine and desserts offered afterwards, of course. I have been having a bad week, and I just wasn't looking forward to it like I should have been. I was mad at myself that I wasn't more anxious and ready for a new form of yoga.
My dad and I had a disagreement, and he's the kind of guy that raises his voice and doesn't mean to. I HATE that. He knows that, too. Does he try to change for me? Not that I can tell. Of course this incident happens on a Monday and throws my whole week off. Of all the weeks, I was just hoping this one would be even toned and nice for me. I hate Valentine's Day. My dad is the only man in my life I think loves me, so I was heart broken he would verbally hurt me when we have an awesome weekend planned next week.
I am VERY glad my mood was changed once I got to class yesterday. Yoga was the best thing for me this week. Tuesday's class was rough since I couldn't focus on my intention. Either way, I am appreciative for my instructor and the practice itself. Partners yoga was new, refreshing and worth it. Emily and I are so in sync. We did an awesome job trusting each other and being able to do the poses without much help. Of course I got confused a few times. I never said I was good at yoga; I just love going to class and being on the mat and nowhere else for an hour and fifteen minutes.
I've been working out nearly everyday since the end of December. Losing weight and building muscle had definitely helped me with my practice. I am able to do poses with better posture and correctly, and I also have been getting closer to getting into poses I was having trouble with, like crow. It's a small thing, but it's a big feat for me. I am starting to find a new passion in life that promotes a healthy mental, physical, and emotional lifestyle for me.
I still can't really figure out what triggered me to keep up with working out daily. I of course wanted to feel better and look good for hopefully a new man to come into my life. I think trying to look "skinny" to find a guy is a bad reason to drag myself to the gym on those mornings I feel I need more sleep, but I don't think I'm continuing with this lifestyle for that reason. My motives have changed.. I think. I am seeing and feeling results, and I need some positive actions in my life. With work, I haven't been feeling "proud" if it since I really don't have any ownership. There's nothing to show my family and friends that I am succeeding at my job. When I work out and perfect my yoga poses, I have something to show for it. I have achievement I can be proud of and continue to work on.
I'm not looking for others to show acceptance and give compliments. It's just that I like that I am making goals for myself and can take ownership for it. No one else is losing my weight or adding my muscle. There are people that I sometimes work out with or I attend yoga with and my instructor that have been alongside me for the ride, but in the end, my health is all up to me. I think I'm writing away just to say that I am finding passion in life and am finding ways to be proud of myself. I'm not "making bank" with a career I set out to have, but I am working on myself and reaching other goals. That should be a good enough reason to allow myself to walk with my head held high and a smile on my face, right?
Last night, my best friend and I did a partner's yoga class that was offered in honor of Valentine's Day. We were more excited for the wine and desserts offered afterwards, of course. I have been having a bad week, and I just wasn't looking forward to it like I should have been. I was mad at myself that I wasn't more anxious and ready for a new form of yoga.
My dad and I had a disagreement, and he's the kind of guy that raises his voice and doesn't mean to. I HATE that. He knows that, too. Does he try to change for me? Not that I can tell. Of course this incident happens on a Monday and throws my whole week off. Of all the weeks, I was just hoping this one would be even toned and nice for me. I hate Valentine's Day. My dad is the only man in my life I think loves me, so I was heart broken he would verbally hurt me when we have an awesome weekend planned next week.
 |
| Tree was our favorite of the night. Well, at least mine! |
I've been working out nearly everyday since the end of December. Losing weight and building muscle had definitely helped me with my practice. I am able to do poses with better posture and correctly, and I also have been getting closer to getting into poses I was having trouble with, like crow. It's a small thing, but it's a big feat for me. I am starting to find a new passion in life that promotes a healthy mental, physical, and emotional lifestyle for me.
I still can't really figure out what triggered me to keep up with working out daily. I of course wanted to feel better and look good for hopefully a new man to come into my life. I think trying to look "skinny" to find a guy is a bad reason to drag myself to the gym on those mornings I feel I need more sleep, but I don't think I'm continuing with this lifestyle for that reason. My motives have changed.. I think. I am seeing and feeling results, and I need some positive actions in my life. With work, I haven't been feeling "proud" if it since I really don't have any ownership. There's nothing to show my family and friends that I am succeeding at my job. When I work out and perfect my yoga poses, I have something to show for it. I have achievement I can be proud of and continue to work on.
I'm not looking for others to show acceptance and give compliments. It's just that I like that I am making goals for myself and can take ownership for it. No one else is losing my weight or adding my muscle. There are people that I sometimes work out with or I attend yoga with and my instructor that have been alongside me for the ride, but in the end, my health is all up to me. I think I'm writing away just to say that I am finding passion in life and am finding ways to be proud of myself. I'm not "making bank" with a career I set out to have, but I am working on myself and reaching other goals. That should be a good enough reason to allow myself to walk with my head held high and a smile on my face, right?
2015: here for a year.
January 7, 2015
I'm funny, aren't I?! I feel like I've been busy since the last time I took a moment to write. There was working out more than usual, seeing old friends in town for the holidays, Christmas, New Year's, and crafting. I'm very pleased 2014 is over. It was a quick, painful year for me.
So, what are my "resolutions"? Well, I don't have any. (What?!) My best friend explained this in a very different way to me. Not word-for-word what she said, but basically, from her perspective, a new year shouldn't mean that she should make changes to her life or seek things she wants to do different. If there's something she wants to work on personally or start doing, she'll do it immediately. As soon as she gets an epiphany, action should be taken as soon as possible, not as a "New Year resolution".
In some aspects of her logic, I agree. This doesn't mean it's a bad idea to take this time of year as a chance to evaluate your life. It just shouldn't be the only time this is done. For some, this is a great way to have extra motivation to make those changes. Personally, I wanted to start getting in shape and look tone, skinnier and healthier. I decided this around Thanksgiving. I could have waited until 2015, but I needed to take action sooner, and I did. I make goals for myself throughout the year, so I guess this is a good time to see where I am at those goals versus brainstorming new ones.
I know in 2015 I want to be happier and find myself again, and I do feel better since the rough patches. 2014 just wasn't my year. Everyone knows that. I enjoyed a lot of moments, but I was very lost. I'm still lost. I'm closer to "being found", so I can smile a little bit more for that. I don't have any New Year goals or resolutions other than to continue the right changes I was trying to make last year and keep seeking new solutions to my issues that aren't quite taken care of yet.
I'm happy to be alive! I'm also happy I am checking things off my bucket list. I cut off 10 inches of hair and donated it, and I went to a NFL game. Next month, I get to knock another thing off my list: my dad and I are going to see Colin Hay! Unfortunately, it won't be in Australia, but this is good enough for me! I am too thrilled that I got tickets for the both of us, and I hope we get to meet him after the show. :)
I'm funny, aren't I?! I feel like I've been busy since the last time I took a moment to write. There was working out more than usual, seeing old friends in town for the holidays, Christmas, New Year's, and crafting. I'm very pleased 2014 is over. It was a quick, painful year for me.
So, what are my "resolutions"? Well, I don't have any. (What?!) My best friend explained this in a very different way to me. Not word-for-word what she said, but basically, from her perspective, a new year shouldn't mean that she should make changes to her life or seek things she wants to do different. If there's something she wants to work on personally or start doing, she'll do it immediately. As soon as she gets an epiphany, action should be taken as soon as possible, not as a "New Year resolution".
In some aspects of her logic, I agree. This doesn't mean it's a bad idea to take this time of year as a chance to evaluate your life. It just shouldn't be the only time this is done. For some, this is a great way to have extra motivation to make those changes. Personally, I wanted to start getting in shape and look tone, skinnier and healthier. I decided this around Thanksgiving. I could have waited until 2015, but I needed to take action sooner, and I did. I make goals for myself throughout the year, so I guess this is a good time to see where I am at those goals versus brainstorming new ones.
I know in 2015 I want to be happier and find myself again, and I do feel better since the rough patches. 2014 just wasn't my year. Everyone knows that. I enjoyed a lot of moments, but I was very lost. I'm still lost. I'm closer to "being found", so I can smile a little bit more for that. I don't have any New Year goals or resolutions other than to continue the right changes I was trying to make last year and keep seeking new solutions to my issues that aren't quite taken care of yet.
I'm happy to be alive! I'm also happy I am checking things off my bucket list. I cut off 10 inches of hair and donated it, and I went to a NFL game. Next month, I get to knock another thing off my list: my dad and I are going to see Colin Hay! Unfortunately, it won't be in Australia, but this is good enough for me! I am too thrilled that I got tickets for the both of us, and I hope we get to meet him after the show. :)
I can't complain.
December 12, 2014
I just had a birthday. 23. Almost 25. I can't believe I'm another year older. I didn't really do much to celebrate. Do I ever? It kind of upsets me that my family has never taken birthdays seriously. For my birthday dinner, we went where I wanted to go, but I had to pay for myself AND my brother. Does that make sense? I thought I was supposed to be treated on my birthday? I always see people on social media get birthday surprise parties or big explanations about why his or her friend should have an awesome day, but I never get those. (I did get one this year. Thanks, bffl!) I don't expect them. But, I can't complain.
30 Days of Being Thankful: Days 27 through 30.
November 30, 2014
Happy Thanksgiving weekend! I tried spending little time on my phone and a lot of time to enjoy cooking, shopping, sewing, talking, and just being with my mom for my break. It was a pretty good break. I can't complain. I had to get away from the work and health news that were bringing me down. I'm sick of not being good enough and having issues I can't control. This is a short post to finish off the 30 days of November. I'm ready for this year to be over.
27. I'm thankful for my mom. She helped me forget about the work stress. We made two t-shirt quilts, cooked, watched movies, did a little bit of shopping, drank lots of coffee, and just relaxed. I don't see her much, but it was enough time to catch up and do most of what we wanted to do.
28. I'm thankful for Colin Hay. He is just simply awesome. I love his lyrics and style of music. Ever since hearing his songs on Scrubs and Garden State, I've listened to more of his work and appreciated every song. Maggie gets me choked up every time. Colin has gotten me through some rough times, and I can't wait to finally see him this coming February! I hope I can get his autograph. Who knows, maybe I'll get out tattooed! (;
29. I'm thankful for television. I've spend over two years "working" in television at school. It was a great experience and a great way to spend my time at school. I appreciate the positive aspects of television and what other inventions that have stemmed from it.
30. I'm thankful for God. Do I need to explain? Even though it's been probably the worst year of my life, I'm still thankful for all the positive events and things that have happened this year. As there weren't many, I know that God must have something better in store and needed me to go through the negative and rough times to get to the positive and better.
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