Ever since I saw the band Good Old War for the first time as last week's Josh Ritter show, I've been listing to the band's songs nonstop. Specifically, The River is a daily play since Friday:
So, as usual, I left the office past normal hours. As I made my way down 70, there was a massive jam. The online map showed an accident in two spots, actually. I checked my fuel gauge, and it was centimeters away from being at empty. Rather than freaking out, I turned up the volume and listened to the song on repeat.
I sat for what felt like a half hour, waiting to make just an inch of progress. Every time the song ended, I pressed replay. Eventually, brake lights ahead of me faded, and we proceeded down the highway. To avoid any more stopping, I took the immediate exit to reach the closest Shell, which was actually at the exit after.
Only after I started pumping gas did I realize I did not feel any anxiety -- as I usually would have felt in a situation similar to this one. I had a sincere smile and was not pouting the 40 minutes added to my commute home.
Fast-forward to Sunday. On the way home from my radio show, the rain quickly picked up. It went from a drizzle to a downpour in a matter of a minute. My dad texted me and said to pull over until it stopped, but I continued.
Remembering the lack of anxiety I felt on Friday driving down 70 for the second time that weekend, I blared the same song, turned on the car's hazard lights, and slowly made my way down the highway until the rain reached a moderate, more manageable condition.
Again, being controlled and relaxed with a good song kept my anxiety at bay. I pulled into my driveway and alerted my dad I arrived safely.
The power of songs with positive affirmations is so important. I'll always associate The River with these two moments when panic attacks could have occurred but didn't. I wish for you to find comfort in music when you most need it.
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